The Importance of Girlfriends - Part 2

As soon as I got my job working in downtown Vancouver, my first thought was that I would get to see my girlfriend Nicole all the time. A few weeks in, I realised how incredibly lucky I was to be able to hang out with one of my best friends every day at lunch. Of course, why wouldn't that be awesome? But it wasn't just fun at lunch, I found that when I got back to work I felt uplifted and was more energetic and had better concentration. 

I decided to do a little research on that and that's what I found all of the positive study results I mentioned in my last post. It seems to be scientifically proven that girlfriends make you healthier in body, mind, and spirit.

One study at UCLA determined that close female bonds had a calming effect on women and the 2000 women who participated in the study reported lower stress levels.  They found that when women were stressed, they felt a need to to connect with someone and/or take care of them. When they do this, it releases the super-calming hormone oxytocin. Apparently oxytocin combined with our bodies estrogen is super powerful.

This is hugely amazing, because first of all, it's not that easy to de-stress. Yoga, baths, massages are all great, but it's not that easy to take your mind off the stress when you are doing them. The other thing is that stress greatly increases the risk of many diseases and ailments. Also, it's a win-win for everyone because two friends help each other without even trying!

It's a new way of looking at it, but it makes perfect sense to me. Having close girlfriends is a natural instinct, just like finding a partner for life. I truly believe female friendships have been around since the beginning of time, I can just picture women, thousands of years ago in their caves or huts or whatever, supporting each other and helping each other with their problems. 

Some women tend to put their other relationships aside when they have a boyfriend or get married. As I said before, this is never a good idea. You need both. Plain and simple. Look at breakups for example. It's so much easier to get through one with the support of friends. Without that, it can be a long and miserable process and without your friends as a sounding board, it's much more difficult to move forward.

Personally, my girlfriends have helped me in so many ways over the years. Through hard times, good times, and so so times. They've helped me to be more organized and disciplined. Helped me learn to cook, bake and even to drive! My girlfriend Nicole actually taught me how to drive because I think my parents were a little terrified (I didn't' have the best corner-taking abilities) and did pretty much all my practice hours with me. I probably never would've gotten my license if it wasn't for her, so thanks Nicky! 

My girls have been there for me so much, that's just one little example that popped into my head.

I have heard some girls say "I don't have any girlfriends" or "I get along better with guys". If this is the case, it's one of two things. The first could be that you don't know any girls that are friend-worthy. You need to find some. They're out there. I promise, I'm not hogging them all. 

The other is that it might be you. I mean no offense, but some girls have had bad experiences in school or whatever, and just keep their distance. I was one of these girls, so I know. Guys are simpler creatures in an emotional sense and they won't talk behind your back, they'll say whatever they think to your face. In some ways that's easier, but it's just not the same. If you have had bad experiences, it's important to let them go, because they might be showing in your attitude towards potential friends. I used to have a hard shell around me until I met some awesome friends in high school who slowly broke it down.

I could write a billion things about friendship, just like I could write a billion things about love, Christmas and books. But I'll leave you with some quotes instead of people who can say things far better than I.

 What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies. -- Aristotle

Hold a true friend with both your hands. -- Nigerian Proverb

  

Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say. -- Anonymous

To all my precious amazing friends, best friends,  and newer friends, thank you for everything you bring to my life.

xoxo,

T